Day of Infamy: Italian Air Force Accidentally Bombs Orlando, Trumps Threatens Trade Sanctions

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Day of Infamy: Italian Air Force Accidentally Bombs Orlando, Trumps Threatens Trade Sanctions

Postby Boots » Tue Jul 18, 2017 11:05 am

Dateline: AP ORLANDO - In an embarrassing International incident, elements of the Italian Air Force, participating in a NATO exercise staging out of MacDill Air Force Base, accidentally bombed a homeowner in Orlando with 20 pounds of Italian sausage. The incident evidently occurred as the Italian aircraft, flying in close formation with the elements of the Alabama air National Guard, attempted an aerial cultural exchange seeking 20 pounds of smoked ribs from Big Bob Gibson's.

According to the Italian pilot, commander Cheff Boyardi, The accident was not purely the fault of the Italian crew.

"It was notta alla our fault, we have performa this typa exchange many times with the Texas Air National Guard, who are da dry rub guys. The difference inna this case wazza that the Alabama people saucea the ribs. After Giuseppe, my bombardier, caught the ribs on da fly, his hands werea fulla dis slippery thick sauce, so a naturally when he go back to throw da beautiful sausage over to complete da exchange, it slippa outta his hands, and poof! Offa she a go, lika a smart dumba bomba, anna hits da poor house. While we apologize to da poor people inna da house, alla dis coulda been avoided iffa de hillybillies simply had known better thanna to a sauca da ribs. Capece??"

President Trump, in response, tweeted out a message to the Italian Presudent: "While there can be no excuse for saucing Ribs, this is not fair trade as the sausage was splattered from Universal Studios to DisneyWorld and can't be eaten. I demand a sausage adjustment tax be paid to the Orlando family. If not, I will have not choice but to launch our B-1 sauce deterrent and start raining down boiled ribs from Venice to Sicily!!"

Asked to comment on behalf of the Democratic Party, Senator Bernie Sanders replied, "Once again, Presudent Trump has become too ingratiated with a foreign power, promising free food to the Itialians, when he should be thinking of our needs at home! I say, drop them on Vermont!! Free boiled ribs for everybody, boiled ribs are a inherent human right!".

American opinion is evidently divided on the crisis, according the latest P-Yew Institute polling, with 60 % favoring dry rub ribs, 30% in favor of wet rub, and 10% preferring Italian sausage.

When asked for comment on behalf of the New Zealand government, where boiled ribs were once considered the national cuisine, an embassy spokesman we spoke to by phone, who would only identify himself as "Russ", replied, "The government and people of New Zealand respect our inherent differences in culture and cuisine with the people of the United States, and value both. Now, bugger off, ya wanker!"

https://www.clickorlando.com/strange-fl ... milys-roof
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Re: Day of Infamy: Italian Air Force Accidentally Bombs Orlando, Trumps Threatens Trade Sanctions

Postby Russ » Tue Jul 18, 2017 4:34 pm

Lol, I love the accent, my late mums friend was married to an Italian, I never understood a word he said,lol. I enjoyed your post, al your own work or adapted??? :deadhorse: :deadhorse:

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Re: Day of Infamy: Italian Air Force Accidentally Bombs Orlando, Trumps Threatens Trade Sanctions

Postby Professor Bunky » Tue Jul 18, 2017 5:00 pm

Great writer's embellishments, Boots.
:laughing7:
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Re: Day of Infamy: Italian Air Force Accidentally Bombs Orlando, Trumps Threatens Trade Sanctions

Postby Sailor Kenshin » Tue Jul 18, 2017 5:02 pm

:shock:

:lol:

Don't SCARE me like that! :laughing7:

Nice work, sir. :salut:
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Re: Day of Infamy: Italian Air Force Accidentally Bombs Orlando, Trumps Threatens Trade Sanctions

Postby OldUsedParts » Tue Jul 18, 2017 6:02 pm

always enjoyable, my friend :tup: :salut: :cheers: Boots shoulda been on the Stage - - - I think there's one leaving at 6pm :laughing7: :D :lol:
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Re: Day of Infamy: Italian Air Force Accidentally Bombs Orlando, Trumps Threatens Trade Sanctions

Postby Boots » Tue Jul 18, 2017 6:52 pm

All my own work. As my parents would have said, "Geez, there goes 7 years of college, right down the drain..."

I have ridden many stages: puberty, adolescence, cycling, the Mullett...

And Sailor, watch out... Putin has got those Badgers over at Swervebuttlovsk loaded up with Borscht, ready to come over the Circle straight for the lobster beds. There are many bad ways to die, but the absolute worst would be to perish under a load of supersonic boiled cabbage. Compared to that, Italian sausage is just manna from heaven.
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Re: Day of Infamy: Italian Air Force Accidentally Bombs Orlando, Trumps Threatens Trade Sanctions

Postby Papa Tom » Tue Jul 18, 2017 7:12 pm

Raining sausage,,,,,this is sooo refreshing after all that FAKE news. :evilnana:
tarde venientibus ossa....

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