Squirrels vs the Church

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CaptJack
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Squirrels vs the Church

Postby CaptJack » Tue Aug 22, 2017 2:04 pm

Squirrels vs the Church

The Presbyterian church called a meeting to decide
what to do about their squirrels. After much prayer
and consideration, they concluded the squirrels were
predestined to be there and they shouldn't interfere
with God's divine will.

At the Baptist church the squirrels had taken
an interest in the baptistery. The deacons met
and decided to put a water slide on the baptistery
and let the squirrels drown themselves. The
squirrels liked the slide and, unfortunately, knew
instinctively how to swim so twice as many
squirrels showed up the following week.

The Methodist church decided that they were
not in a position to harm any of God's creatures.
So, they humanely trapped their squirrels and
set them free near the Baptist Church. Two
weeks later the squirrels were back when the
Baptists took down the water slide.

But the Catholic Church came up with a very
creative strategy. They baptized all the squirrels
and consecrated them as members of the church.
Now they only see them on Christmas and Easter.

Not much was heard from the Jewish synagogue;
they took the first squirrel and circumcised him.
They haven't seen a squirrel since.
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jwh
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Re: Squirrels vs the Church

Postby jwh » Tue Aug 22, 2017 3:20 pm

On a *slightly* different note, Mississippi Squirrel Revival

The Mississipp Squirrel Revival
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OldUsedParts
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Re: Squirrels vs the Church

Postby OldUsedParts » Tue Aug 22, 2017 3:30 pm

GMTA - - - ya beat me to it, Josh :tup:
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